Ask the Expert Sandi Esptein coaches clients on home life and work. She also coaches on business issues and has over 15 years experience in marketing and business management with an MBA from Columbia University. Ask her all your work and family balance questions. Expectations for child care help Q: Please tell us what the expectations should be for live in help. We have a 15 month old and a 3 month old. My wife works part time. What should be our expectations for child care and house work from our live-in help? Carl A: Dear Carl, You are right to be wondering what expectations to set for childcare help regarding house care and child care tasks. It is important to set expectations up front even as early as the interview process as some childcare providers may not want to do any household chores. First, determine the number of hours per week the care provider is to work - 50 hours is common. Then I would suggest you determine what amount of time you and your wife want to care for the children directly, if you want nights out, or if you will expect to be traveling and need 24 hour care. Then determine the house care tasks to be shared - laundry, cooking, shopping, general clean-up. With this information you can get an idea of what would be ideal support. Every child care person is different in their abilities and energy level and may be able to accomplish more or less of the house care activities. Your agreement should be worked out over time with regular communication check-ins scheduled up front which decreases the fear factor when you say "lets talk about how you are doing". Remember a loving, caring individual for your children comes first at these young ages. Good luck, Sandi Epstein Also see: • Ask Sandi a question • Recently asked questions • More information on coaching from Sandi