From power lunches to Power Rangers (continued) PRIORITIZE YOUR LIFE Think of your life as a buffet spread. Despite your good intentions, you still can't have it all. You can, however, load up on the best stuff they offer. You just have to make sure you eat the lobster, créme brulé and baby asparagus first, otherwise you'll be very disappointed when you fill up on the potatoes, macaroni salad and canned fruit cocktail. Much like the buffet, your life is full of choices. If you choose to fill it with 60-hour work weeks and no vacations, you'll probably find yourself becoming tired, resentful and angry at work and at home. "It's difficult to leave your work at work," says Sherry Gary, First Vice President of Investments, Commodity Futures Sales at Smith Barney. "I try very hard to shut work off when I walk in the door at home. I have found that if I can allow myself to be totally present in the moment of what I'm doing with my daughter, then I can listen and actually have fun." Gary also suggests time outs - for yourself, not just your kids. "My job is very stressful and people-intensive. If I take a walk with my dog after work or go hiking on the weekends, it helps me refocus. Finding solitary time is the best way to invigorate yourself again." But how do you choose what's a priority and what's not? "One good rule of thumb is to ask yourself if the problem will matter in five years," says Dr. Jeanette LeBlanc, a counselor, college professor, mother and follower of Simplistic Living. "If the closet is a mess but you can shut the door, shut the door. If you can't join the committee, don't join the committee. Stop overloading yourself. Your kids will grow up fast enough as it is. You don't want to look back in twenty years and wish you had spent more time with them." The point is, let the little things go. You'll be amazed how good it feels to say "no." RIDE THE WAVES Of all the advice you'll ever get from executive moms, "Have fun" may be the most valuable. The most successful, well-balanced women are those that laugh at themselves, enjoy what they do (at least most of the time) and take time to smell the roses. "I'd never survive my job if I didn't take some time to blow off steam," says Bueckers. "Sometimes just having something to look forward to is enough to get me through a tough day; a weekend of golf, a night at the movies with my husband or playing the piano after dinner. Whether its an hour, an evening or a few days, forgetting about work helps me return with a clean slate the next day." Another advantage of having fun is that it can make the late nights and weekends seem worthwhile. "When I work extra hours just to pay off bills or put money into a retirement fund that I won't use for another twenty years, I find myself asking 'Is this worth it?'" says Bueckers. "But when I spend that extra time to close that big deal and then get to spend the money on something fun with my daughter, I really feel like I'm immediately reaping the benefits of my hard work." FIND AN OUTLET Think you're the only one who's got problems? Don't count on it. What you can count on is the fact that - unless you live in the sticks - there are probably plenty of other women in your town that are experiencing "double duty" stress. Rita Hagerman, mother of three, owns two New York printing presses and a newspaper. "I joined a group last year called, W.W.W.W.H. - 'Women Who Work With Husbands.' There are about 20 of us who meet once a month to let off steam and get support. We have lots of fun activities, like auctioning off silly items and then giving the money to local charities or children we read about in the paper who need financial assistance for medical surgeries." According to Hagerman, finding other women who work full-time and raise families has helped her cope with her busy schedule. "Knowing that there are other women out there going through the same daily stresses really helps," she says. "Having a sense of humor about your life also helps. I even refer to myself as the V.P. - Volunteer to the President." However you cope with your multiple responsibilities, you will probably find one common trait with other women in your same situation; family comes first. "The life of a working mom is full of sacrifices. Your time, your money, your energy," says Bueckers. "But no matter what, as a working mom, it's never going to be my family that is sacrificed." "If I had to decide between keeping a job that paid $100,000 a year and missing my daughter's choir performances, there would be no choice," says Boyd. "It's not worth making all the money in the world to miss out on my kids' lives." Also see: • Ten ways to find work and family balance • Top four working mother challenges and solutions • From power lunch to power pumping: breastfeeding at work • More articles about finding balance Wendy Burt is a freelance writer based in Colorado.