To work or not to work ... By Doris Walker I was going to be a stay-at-home mom. We planned, saved and worked for this day since we were married. So why, as my maternity clothes grew tight, did panic settle over me at the thought of staying home full time? Is this really what I want? Even women certain about continuing their career have questioned their decision and ability to have and do it all. The answer is to find the right workplan and be ready to change it as your family grows. Below are some steps that will help determine what is the best workplan for you and your growing family. Discuss it with your husband/partner As soon as you question your current plan, discuss it. This gives both of you time realize that the current workplan may not work and start saving money, if necessary. Going through these steps together strengthens your relationship and saves you from having to sell a decision made without his input. Determine your options Get information about company-wide policies. If there are none, talk to your manager or department head. Chances are they don't want to lose you to staying home full time or to another company that offers more family friendly options. Since my company offered no nontraditional options, I went to my Director, explained the situation and discussed options that might work for both of us. Decide what to sacrifice There are no perfect options. There will be sacrifices by both parents. Time, money, convenience and fast-paced career growth are among the biggest. The best option will be the one with sacrifices you can both live with. After considering each option and its sacrifices, we decided that I would continue to work full-time, but 2 ½ days a week I would telecommute. This way our son could be cared for by family, including my husband telecommuting once a week. Set a trial period After spending six to twelve glorious weeks at home with your new baby, going back to work is a transition. Giving yourself at least a ninety-day trial period will provide time to transition into your new schedule and give your workplan a fair trial. Once you're through the trial period, change your workplan as needed. As your child grows and develops, your workplan may need to change as well. During the first four months, our workplan was a great success. I was more productive telecommuting then in the office and my husband managed better than expected....... Then our son learned to crawl. This changed everything. Work time lasted about 4 hours a day during naps, swing and playpen time. Our workplan needed to change. We could have hired sitter for those days, but we struggled through another six months and chose to try our original workplan. After having and doing it all, I have to admit I was ready to just be a mom. People may say our workplan failed, but I disagree. As a career mom, I tested the limits of my abilities, learned to depend more on my husband and started to take control of my workplan. Doris Walker is a former Corporate Trainer for a Fortune 100 Company and mother of a 14 month old. She is expecting her 2nd child in November 2000.