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Ask the Business Coach Getting AheadQuestion: As a diligent worker with much experience and training, I can't seem to 'get ahead' in my government agency. I have considered leaving but there are not many opportunities in the area and my husband also works in the area. The past few promotions in my organization have been to those from the 'good old boy' network (fellow hunters or golfers) or those who have had 'extra-curricular' encounters with the management, if you know what I mean. In fact a current potential promotion will probably go to a woman who is now married to her former (now retired) supervisor (after his divorce and her loss of an alienation of affection lawsuit). A recent promotion was 'made' for another woman who 'worked' her way up the corporate ladder in the same section, but gained very little experience. I am just one of the several personnel who now do many of the tasks she is not capable of. I've gotten to where I can't sleep at night. My family is the only thing that keeps me going. I have explored every avenue to 'get out' of this section, but so far no luck. If I make an issue of it, I will be 'labeled' and have NO career progression. What can I do to stop caring about this terrible division?Cheryl Answer: Henry Ford said, "If you think can - or you think you can't - you're right." So, first - take charge of your 'I can't' thinking. Turn your attention away from feeling victimized by the 'good old boys' to feeling self-respecting about the job you do well in a principled manner. Stop blaming the success of others for what you think you are not getting. Even if it is true that others are getting promotions they don't deserve, that has nothing to do with you. And, that kind of thinking can only harm you. Let's concentrate on what you need to do to get ahead - or out. If you are inappropriately picking up slack for other co-workers, start setting boundaries that will prevent you from being used. Be polite but firm about staying focused on your own job. If you're doing just a mediocre job because you think doing any better won't matter anyhow - get over it. Do your best everyday. And, make sure your supervisors know regularly and in a positive way, what contributions you are making. Take time to carefully assess what it is that you really want out of a job. If you can not truly say that you can achieve that where you are - and that you keep this job just because it's close to home - you owe it to yourself and your co-workers to make a change. You will never be a positive influence in your workplace if you truly don't want to be there. If there is potential for you to achieve your work goals where you are, then get tough and do what it takes. Be a leader in your section. Don't cooperate with doing the wrong thing then complaining about it. Ask your family for their help in keeping you in a positive frame of mind. Tell them how important it is for you to stay in the solution - NOT in the problem. Make it a part of your family time together to discuss the progress you are making with your thoughts about work and how you can improve your situation.
Once you get honest with yourself, Cheryl, face what's really best for you and determine to do that - that's when things really change. Either that transfer will show up or you'll spot another job that will be a lot more satisfying. Remember, after you really know what you want - attitude will count for 90% of your success.
Also see: Disclaimer: The information in this column is intended to provide the reader with general ideas or concepts to be used as part of a broader base of knowledge they collect to determine their own best course of action and solutions most suitable for solving their workplace challenges. The information in this column is not guaranteed to be the appropriate solution for each individual.
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Joyce K. Reynolds is an expert Business Coach who works with CEOs, Sr. Execs, entrepreneurs and countless others providing knowledge, solutions, motivation and support that assist her clientele in successfully meeting workplace challenges.