Ask the Business Coach Joyce K. Reynolds is an expert Business Coach who works with CEOs, Sr. Execs, entrepreneurs and countless others providing knowledge, solutions, motivation and support that assist her clientele in successfully meeting workplace challenges. Find out more about Joyce's coaching practice. Hostility at Work Question: In my new job, my boss, and Executive Director, is spoken to routinely by the President of the BOD in a hostile, confrontational, accusative and disruptive way. I spoke up about it but was told to be more tolerant. My boss doesn't want to stand up for herself to the Executive Board, and I'm afraid she has made me look bad for telling this jerk to take his hostile accusations out of the office. We have a small one-room office and when they go at it they both look and sound foolish. We are both wiped out for the rest of the day afterwards. What should I do? Susan Answer: The work environment you describe is clearly abusive and could easily lead to not only lower morale, but reduced productivity. Your supervisor - by tolerating the dysfunctional, rude behavior you describe - is clearly intimidated and, if that is the case, presently ill-equipped to make the necessary changes to improve things. Regarding your ‘speaking up’ to the President, there are a couple of things to consider. First, whether or not you have a valid point, you are out of line in attempting to intervene in this way. Rather than being concerned that your boss is making you look bad for ‘telling this jerk to take his hostile accusations out of the office, ” it is important for you to understand that this kind of response only makes you a participant in the verbal abuse that is flying around the office. That said, if you are still dedicated to staying - and, I would encourage you to fully examine this as a decision - you will definitely want to make an attempt at improving conditions for yourself in a more positive and productive way. While you cannot begin to address why your Executive Director is permitting such self-defeating, punishing interactions, you can certainly make a case for why it’s not good for the company to have it continue. Even though it is an unconventional approach, you might very well make a difference by aligning with your Executive Director behind the scenes and helping her to ward off the President’s offending behavior. That means a little reverse training. Explain that while conflict is desirable as long as it is under control and as long as you use it positively, this case doesn’t seem to fit into that scenario. That it is in your mutual best interests to be part of a solution towards reaching the ultimate goal of having the company - and all its employees - do well under improved circumstances. In an effort to move in direction, suggest to her that you two work in league to achieve a more harmonious work environment. Along those lines, feed her information and give her ammunition that will aid her in managing her boss. Suggest that she make an outside appointment with the President to discuss the issues of corporate culture and workplace attitude. Not in light of increasing employee satisfaction - however valid that might be - but, rather, that attention to this issue will allow you all to reach your full potential and, thereby, maximize your contributions to the business. In other words, if your boss hasn’t figured it out and you want to give it a little more time, hand her the tools. Be very clear, that abuse in the workplace is not acceptable if you are to remain. As you wait out any possible change, excuse yourself if there is a breach. Simply step outside the office so you are, unequivocally, not a part of this negative and damaging behavior. If your offer is turned away, you clearly need to find a more suitable workplace. In fact, unless both parties to this abuse are not reasonable in facing the problem and putting into place some serious corrections, I’d suggest you make plans to get out - pronto. Also see: • Ask Joyce your workplace questions • More questions • One-on-one business coaching Disclaimer: The information in this column is intended to provide the reader with general ideas or concepts to be used as part of a broader base of knowledge they collect to determine their own best course of action and solutions most suitable for solving their workplace challenges. The information in this column is not guaranteed to be the appropriate solution for each individual.