Ask the Expert: Finding Balance Natalie Gahrmann is a success coach and owner of N-R-G Coaching Associates, a private coaching company that specializes in helping working parents achieve mastery of work and life. Her clients experience more clarity, direction and alignment while reducing stress in their busy lives. Relationship with Spouse Alicia writes, "My husband and I both work, by the time we get home, make dinner and spend time with the kids doing homework, we're exhausted. It seems we never have any time for each other. And I feel that it is beginning to stress our relationship. Any suggestions?" Answer: The strain you are experiencing in your marriage is a prevalent problem for working parents. In fact, a tip I wrote last year in my free weekly eZine, "Practical Tips for Working Parents" focused on ways to Rekindle Romance. It's important to reconnect with your spouse. The relationship between you and your spouse is the cornerstone of your family's stability and happiness. So, as with anything that is truly important to you, you must commit to make the time. Undoubtedly, children and work take much of your time, attention and energy. Avoid getting so immersed in outside responsibilities that you neglect putting quality time and energy with your spouse as a priority. Reconnect now to the vows you once shared together with your spouse to love, honor and cherish each other as long as you both shall live. Take a break from your busy harried life to enjoy some time with your spouse alone. Make this a time to talk, to laugh, and to do the things you used to enjoy doing when you were dating. The time is now to leap over the obstacles and responsibilities to make your spouse a priority. Your attention is being diverted in a dozen ways and your spouse is often far from the top of the list. With both of you working and exhausted by the end of the day, spending time together may need to be a planned event rather than a spontaneous happening. Either planned, or spontaneous, here are a few ideas to stimulate your romance and help you create time alone together: Arrange a date with your spouse at least once a month (to start!) Hire a babysitter or arrange for a friend/family member to watch the kids while you slip out for a quiet dinner Create a weekly ritual for sacred time together that you both commit to (maybe every Thursday night becomes your 'date' night) If you and your spouse work close enough together, meet for lunch or a secret rendezvous Get up early in the morning to have a peaceful breakfast together (while you still have your energy!) Take a day off occasionally to play "hooky" together Take a bubble bath or shower together Go for a walk, run, bike ride or hike together Hug each other warmly and kiss hello and goodbye Plan time for you and your spouse to connect with your own friends You'll have more physical and emotional energy and love to give your children if you are satisfied as a couple. Don't lose sight of what's truly most important in your life. Remember there is a give and take motion in every healthy relationship. Discuss with your spouse how you can make spending quality time together a priority in your busy lives. Come from the perspective that it IS possible to spend quality time together and be creative in finding fun ways to be alone. Also see: • Ask Natalie a question • More Q&A • If you're interested in work/life coaching, you can reach Natalie at (908) 281-7098 or via email