Ask the Image Expert Sherry Maysonave is the founder and president of Empowerment Enterprises, one of America's leading communication-image firms. Sherry conducts corporate seminars and coaches executives, professionals, and politicians in achieving excellence in communication and image. She is also the author of Casual Power: How to Power Up your Nonverbal Communication and Dress Down for Success Professional Hairstyles Question: Because of my religion, I do not cut my hair and I do not wear makeup except for a foundation and some clear lipstick, clear fingernail polish, etc. My hair is not very long, little past my shoulders. I need some new hairdo's. Can you tell me where on the web I can go to find some new ways to do my hair? (specific instructions?) I have been doing it basically the same way for years now and I feel like someone from the 60's. I try to detract from what I think of as an Unattractive profile by doing my hair in the same old "fluffy" style. Am I beyond help? I am in my 50's and I feel ugly. Thought something new with my hair might help. Thanks! Dee Answer: Dear Dee, You are definitely NOT beyond help, but it pains me to hear that you feel ugly! Before we discuss hairstyles, I want to recommend three uplifting processes for you to do on a regular basis. 1. Look into a mirror; make eye contact with yourself. When you feel connected to the inner you, tell yourself that you are a beautiful woman, all the while maintaining eye contact. Repeat several times. If not everyday (which is desirable), do this several times a week for at least three months. 2. Buy a new journal or any small blank book. Begin to list all of your beautiful features and qualities. (Yes, you have them, and in abundance!) Write down anything that anyone has ever told you, things like “You have great eyebrows, good knees” …anything, even if you do not feel that it’s true! Read the list every day and be sure to add a new item to that list once or twice a week, at a minimum. If you are doing the mirror exercise above, you will not have a problem adding to the list. 3. Read jokes or humorous stories. Why? They will make you laugh or at least chuckle or be amused. Genuine smiles are always attractive. When we can have a little laugh every day or carry a chuckle inside of us, other people find us more attractive. Then guess what, we start feeling more attractive because of the positive response from others. After three months of doing these processes on a consistent basis, please e-mail me back and let me know how you feel. Now, on to your hair. I applaud you for wanting to update your hairstyle for it sounds as if a change is in order. Check out these three web sites for some new hair ideas: www.hairdos.com, www.hair-styles.org, www.hairboutique.com. The latter of the three specializes in updos; the first two also have segments on putting hair up. Since you have some length on your hair, you should be able to put it up in different ways. You may also want to consider consulting a reputable stylist to gain some other ideas or to teach you specific techniques. Lastly, I suspect that your hormones are changing. Have you seen your doctor about hormone replacement therapy or nutritional supplements? When hormones change, sometimes a woman’s skin tone and hair color begins to look dull. Along with the desire to change your hair (which is a good idea!), hormones could be contributing to your feelings. If your religion allows it, try wearing a light blush on your cheeks. If it’s not allowed, pinch your cheeks several times a day to add a rosy glow. Best of luck to you, Sherry Maysonave Also see: How much makeup should I wear at work? Ask your image questions Personal Power: A case study from 'Casual Power'