Successful child care provider relationships by Maria Bailey Making the decision to place your child in a day care facility can be difficult, but the success of your experience and the experience of your child can be enhanced by your relationship with the day care providers. As a working mother, your time is valuable so you want to get the most out of the effort you are able to dedicate toward developing a relationship which is positive and productive. It's essential that you are totally comfortable with the personnel and instructors who will be caring for your child. If you feel apprehension, that emotion can easily be detected by your child and result in tearful good-byes each morning. One way to quickly develop a comfort zone is to be able to visit the facility any time during operating hours. You don't want to feel like they have anything to hide and you certainly want to have access to your child when you desire it. Make sure you fully understand the open door policies of the facility prior to enrollment. This is a good time to ask the caregiver about the qualifications and experience of the child care staff. Include questions about turnover rates and change of staff throughout the day. Because of the long hours, there are often different caregivers late in the afternoon. Ask about the facilities' discipline policy. Many different dicipline methods exist, so be sure you are comfortable and able to reinforce the policy at home. It's been said that it takes a village to raise a child. Your day care provider is a big portion of your village. Think of them as part of your support system and work together to develop your child in the hours you are way. Keep them up to date on new skills your child has learned and skills you are working on at home. Repetition at school as well as home will produce speedier results. Communication is the best way to gauge your child's success so encourage your child to talk about his day care experience. Review the day's activities with him on the car ride home and describe with enthusiasm the events on the calendar for the remainder of the week. It's a good idea to hang artwork and reminders on the refrigerator or in other visible place around the house to reinforce the positive elements of day care. Every day care provider should have a set schedule or routine for your child's class. The schedule should be age appropriate taking into consideration that toddlers attention span is far shorter than that of a preschooler. Become familiar with your child's daily routine and try to stick to it on the weekend. Children thrive on routine and boundaries. Keeping a his routine consistent will make his transition from weekends with mom to weekdays at school easier. Address any concerns you have with your day care provider as you experience them. When it comes to the health and safety of your child, you don't want to wait until something bad happens to ask questions or change behaviors. Any successful relationship is based on open lines of communication and your day care provider is no exception. Remember to address your issues out of ear's range of your child. Children are masters of playing the emotions of grown-ups whether it's mom and dad or mom and caregiver. If you allow your child to perceive tension or distrust, it will effect his willingness to learn and adapt to day care. Every working mother must come to terms with a day care solution that works best for her and her child. Whether it's an in home provider or day care facility, the success of the solution is dictated by comfort level which leads to the solution. Also see: • Guide to child care choices • Child care message boards Maria Bailey is the mother of four and founder of BlueSuitMom.com. After having a nanny for four years, she recently placed her youngest in a day care center.