Age alone doesn't determine readiness for toilet training By Debbie Glasser Schenck For many parents of young toddlers, the words "toilet training" can elicit feelings of fear and dread. But teaching young children toileting skills is a very natural process that can be a positive learning experience for both of you. "Is my child ready?" "What is the best way to teach my child to use the potty?" and "When will my child finally be out of diapers?" are common questions. It is important to remember that there is no magical age or method that applies for all children and families. Several factors should be considered when assessing a child for toileting readiness. Age, alone, is not necessarily an adequate indicator of toileting readiness. There is, in fact, considerable variability in the age at which children attain bowel and bladder control. As a general guideline, however, mot typically developing children can be ready to initiate the toilet-learning process between 2 and 2 1/2 years old. There are some readiness signals you can look for which include: Your child remains dry for at least two hours at a time during the day or is dry after naps. Your child's bowel movements are regular and predictable. Your child can follow simple verbal directions. Your child can take his pants off and walk o and from the bathroom. Your child is uncomfortable with soiled diapers and wants them changed. Your child asks to use the toilet, or potty-chair. There are no hard and fast rules and this list is not all - inclusive. If your child is exhibiting these readiness signals, there are steps you can take to facilitate the toilet-learning process. First, it is important to remember that toilet learning is a step in your child's development. It involves the development of new skills and provides an age-appropriate opportunity for children to assert their independence. Toilet learning is not a discipline issue. The approach to toilet learning should include plenty of encouragement and patience. There is no place for pressure or punishment. Find ways for your child to feel in control of the process. For example, give your child a choice regarding whether he wants to wear "Big Bird" or "Super Hero" underwear. The ultimate goal is for your child to develop the skills to use the potty independently, when he or she is ready. This is a new skill that can take several months to learn. Because toilet training is a learning process, accidents will happen. Remain neutral, non-punitive and encouraging. If for example, your daughter is walking to the potty and accidentally urinates on the floor before reaching the bathroom, you can respond, "You almost made it to the potty. Good trying! Let's get you clean and you can try again next time." Encourage her efforts rather than focusing on results. Some additional suggestions to help the process include: Keep your child's diapers off whenever possible. Dress your child in loose clothing so he can pull them on and off by himself and feel independent. Introduce a book or video about toilet learning so your child can see other children learning to use the potty. These materials are available at most bookstores and libraries. Some children become resistant to toilet training. If you feel you have put too much pressure on your child, take a few weeks off and slowly introduce the potty again. Also, avoid over-reminding your child to use the potty. If your child's toileting habits change suddenly or you have any specific concerns consult your child's pediatrician. Toilet learning is a natural process in a young child's life. Rather than focusing on your child's age, read his cues. This will enhance the learning process for you and your child. Toilet learning is an important developmental step that, when handles respectfully, encourages a sense of independence and self-esteem. Debbie Glasser Schenck, Ph.D., is the director of Fanily Support Services at Nova Southeastern University.