Ask the Expert Sandi Esptein coaches clients on home life and work. She also coaches on business issues and has over 15 years experience in marketing and business management with an MBA from Columbia University. Ask her all your work and family balance questions. Afterhours Work Functions Q: Dear Sandi, Recently I have been asked to attend meetings and work-related social functions in the evening. I would like to limit the number of these functions I attend, because on these days I leave for work before my daughter wakes up and return home after she is in bed for the evening. How should I approach this with my boss? Joann A: Setting limits at work is not easy. The key to success when working with reasonable supervisors is to have a discussion with your supervisor with his or her concerns and needs clearly articulated, and solutions which address these and your own needs. In your case, I would ask first what is the purpose of the evening events? Is it to sell new business (then perhaps you can find alternative ways to hit the sales goals), is it to gain visibility for the company? (then what alternatives are there to do that?). The idea is find the reasoning behind the request and problem solve a mutually agreeable solution. This also may present another opportunity which is, if you spend 5 hours at evening events this week then greater flexibility can be requested during the day. Perhaps you could come in later in the morning or have an afternoon off to spend with your children. This would lead to even more time with the kids then before. Good Luck! Also see: • Balancing a career with a young family is rather difficult. What should I do in order not being feel guilty? • Ask Sandi a question • More information on coaching from Sandi