Ask the Expert Randy Prange is a business advisor and CEO of Insights, Inc., a nationally recognized strategic planning and business development firm. Friendship with Boss Q: Dear Randy, I am a middle manager in a medium sized company. My boss, who is the only female senior executive in the company, seems to want to also be my friend. She often invites me to lunch, has suggested we take our husbands to a movie sometime and often tells me more about what's going on in the company's senior management discussions that I think I would normally be told. Is it a good idea for me to advance my friendship with my boss, or should I try to cool it for fear it gets out of hand sometime and costs me my job. Mary Elizabeth A: Dear Mary Elizabeth, You have an interesting question. One that many of my readers would probably love to have as a "problem." However, as much as it sounds like a positive opportunity, you are very correct in anticipating potential problems. There are valuable considerations on both sides of the issue. The negatives, as you point out, are potentially very real. If you nurture a more personal relationship with your boss, there are any number of consequences that could result. Co-worker jealousy is a possible outcome of a visibly favorable relationship with your (their) boss. This can lead to intentional/unintentional undermining of your work and reputation in the company. The friendship, if not handled discreetly, may even cause problems for your boss. If her boss observes signs or favoritism or worse yet, receives complaints from her subordinates, there may be disciplinary issues for your boss. Obviously, if the relationship between you and your boss sours for some reason, your fault or not, it can place you in an awkward position or possibly lead to a loss of status or employment. On the up side, developing quality friendships with your boss can be rewarding. It happens all the time. A key to keeping it on the up side is your attitude and understanding of the relationship structure. You are first and foremost their employee. Don't forget. Ever. You will still face them the next day at work and will be in a subordinate position. You must never use or hint at using the relationship to promote your efforts at the office. If anything, you must care for your boss' reputation more so than under normal employee conditions. When enjoying outside activities, try to keep the conversations on non-business topics, unless directed there by your boss. Most likely, your boss may occasionally want to get a few words in on something of importance that was left unfinished at the office. However, your approach should be to respond to the degree necessary to show interest and responsibility, but be ready to move on to non-work topics as soon as your boss gives the hint. Don't attempt to use this personal time to capitalize on opportunities at the office. Show your boss that you are interested in a genuine friendship, not just an opportunity to exploit them. A sincere friendship with your boss today can become a lifetime friendship that you will find personally rewarding Also see: • "While in the process of interviewing for a new job, I found out I was a few weeks pregnant. At what point does it make sense for me to give them the good news?" Randy's advice • "My new boss is ten years younger than I am, not married and practically lives at work. I feel like he expects me to do the same. What should I do?" Randy's advice • Submit your questions for Randy Disclaimer: The information in this column is intended to provide the reader with general ideas or concepts to be used as part of a broader base of knowledge they collect to determine their own best course of action and solutions most suitable for solving their workplace challenges. The information in this column is not guaranteed to be the appropriate solution for each individual. The information provided is based on personal observations and experiences of the writer that have been garnered over years as a business manager, owner and executive business coach and counselor.