Ask the Expert Dr. Roni Leiderman, Associate Dean at The Family and School Center of Nova Southeastern University, is not only an expert on parenting issues but the working mother of two children. Discipline challenges with step children Question: I recently married a wonderful man with a 13 year old daughter who lives with us fulltime. Although we agree on our discipline style, whenever I reprimand his daughter, he seems to side with her argument. Teenagers are tough in any situation but my husband's lack of support seems to be making it more difficult. Any suggestions? - Allison Answer: It is challenging for parents to find a common ground when it comes to discipline, particularly with adolescents. In your situation, as a step-parent, you have additional issues. The key to finding a peaceful co-existence may lie in the ability to communicate openly and honestly with your husband. Make time to discuss your feelings about your role as a disciplinarian. Remember to do this during times when there aren't active conflicts. It will be important for you to both listen, understand and validate each other's feelings. Step-parents have to work hard to gain the trust of their step-children. At the same time, realize that your husband is also grappling with this new situation and may find it difficult to observe your interactions with his daughter during difficult times. Take advantage of parenting classes. Through programs like STEP (Systematic Training for Effective Parenting), you and your spouse can learn strategies as you dialogue with and gain support from other families. Step-families take time to become cohesive units. Pay attention to each other's feelings, be open and fair with your communications, and have patience. If you find that your situation is becoming more frustrating, or if you sense that your step-daughter is having difficulties, consider seeking professional help via a family counselor or psychologist. Other recently asked questions • What age is it appropriate for girls to wear makeup? • Submit your questions