Ask the Expert Dr. Roni Leiderman, Associate Dean at The Family and School Center of Nova Southeastern University, is not only an expert on parenting issues but the working mother of two children. Getting Children to Share Toys Question: My kids are always fighting over their toys. How do I get them to share? - Eve Answer: Eve, Children, particularly siblings, have to learn about the giving and taking involved in sharing before they get it "right". Depending on the age of your children, give them the opportunity to work out many of their issues regarding their toys. Model appropriate responses: "I can see that you aren't finished playing with the blocks now. Tell your brother that he can have them when you are done building your tower." Be careful not to take sides or make judgments as to who had which toy first. If, after modeling and calmly offering suggestions your children still can't seem to figure out a solution, remind them what the consequences are. For example, "I know you can figure out a way to share the TV remote control. If you can't, I'll have to turn the TV off for a while". It becomes their choice whether or not to come to a compromise or have the TV turned off. Children learn about sharing through continued experiences. Remember that through modeling patience and tolerance, your children will develop the social skills of sharing and cooperating and making friends. Other recently asked questions • My husband seems to think threatening our three year old daughter is the best way to get her to obey. Problem is that he normally caves and doesn’t follow through. How can I stop this? • My two-year old is beginning to turn everything into a negotiation, especially bedtime. What can I do? • More questions • Submit your questions