Things We Take for Granted

By Maria Bailey

I think it is human nature to take things for granted. As mothers, we have a particular way of combining taking things for granted and learning to tolerate annoyances. It's something we are forced to learn out of necessarily. Can you imagine if we let every spill annoy us? I've gotten so good at just accepting spilled milk at the dinner table that sometimes I don't even realize I'm wiping it up. It's just a part of dinner. Think about it. Don't you just expect to have to bribe your child with treats when you take him or her to the grocery store with you? You know that you are going to have to say "no" to at least seven different cereals, "no" to at least 4 different high sugar snacks and you are going to hear "yuck" when you put the string beans into the cart. It is all very predictable. Once I found myself saying "no" to a child in the cookie aisle and it wasn't even my child. I was reminded recently of another annoyance I accept on a daily basis: backseat noise. Let me set the scene for you. It was necessary on this particular day for my childless business partner, Rachael, to drive my Suburban with me and my two youngest to a funeral. First observation to make is that my Suburban is much larger than Rachael's sporty, red Mustang. I used to drive a sports car when I was young and without kids too, but over the years I've accepted that a mini-van or any other vehicle that can fit at least seven people in it must be my transportation of choice. Second observation, Rachael was not very entertained by our selection of music. Doesn't everyone listen to Disney CDs while driving? I've grown fond of the Chipmunk's singing Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star. It's much better than Brittany Spears replayed eight times within a two mile ride to the store. The final observation came halfway to our destination. At a red light, Rachael innocently turned back to me while I was fighting with Morgan to keep on her seatbelt and asked, "How do you concentrate on driving with all the noise and commotion in the back seat?" My world came to a screeching halt. Wow, that's right. Rachael never rides with anymore than rock music and a briefcase in the car. I've just come to ignore the fights, taunting and constant questions from the backseat. I think I'd be kind of lonely without it. I just take it for granted that I will have to deal with backseat chaos as long as I have kids in the car. This week, we were all reminded about another side of taking things for granted. How often do we take it for granted that when we drop off our children at school we will pick them up happy and healthy at the end of the day? I am sure the two mothers who lost their sons in California on Tuesday took that for granted the morning as they said goodbye. I don't ever want to feel what they must have felt when they realized that it was their last morning together. I don't fear many things, but I do fear losing my children. It produces a chill in my body even thinking about it. Unfortunately, the loss of child struck even closer to home this week. On Wednesday, a former co-worker's son was killed in a car accident. At a time when he should have been in school, he was for some reason driving around town apparently doing something he should not have been doing. My heart broke for his father who only years ago beat cancer after been diagnosed as terminal. How ironic that God would have let him live only to suffer such a great loss. I can only hope that somehow he learned a lesson from his fight with cancer that will give him additional strength in dealing with the death of his son. When reflecting on the California school shooting and the death of my friend's son, I couldn't help but wonder how we protect our children from not only others but themselves as well. Do we take it for granted that our children are going to obey us or heed our warnings of danger? Do we take it for granted as we complain about all the child-created annoyances we live with daily, that they will always be there? Perhaps we are forced to witness these tragedies and others so that we stop every now and then and appreciate our children and just being a mom. I must admit that my children got a few extra hugs this morning as I dropped them off at school.

Share your thoughts on our message board or email Maria.

Also see:
• Week Twenty-Six -- My youngest turned two
• Week Twenty-Five -- Losing someone you love
• Week Twenty-Four -- Where's the romance in Valentine's Day?
• Week Twenty-Three -- The call I've been waiting for
• Week Twenty-Two -- Where did the weekend go?
• Week Twenty-One -- Business trip challenges
• Week Twenty -- Girl Scout cookie time
• Week Nineteen -- Thoughts on motherhood
• Week Eighteen -- No more resolutions
• Week Seventeen -- Holiday Letter
• Week Sixteen -- Holiday traditions
• Week Fifteen -- Who's bed is it anyway?
• Week Fourteen -- Holding a child's hand
• Week Thirteen -- Attending a bris
• More diary entries

Maria Bailey is the CEO and founder of BlueSuitMom.com and a mother of four children under the age of seven.