Two Funerals and a Wedding

By Maria Bailey

The movie was called Three Weddings and a Funeral, but my week was Two Funerals and a Wedding. Although each were very different events in extremely different places with very different groups of people, I'm about to tell you how much they were extremely alike. Last Saturday brought about the deaths of two very wonderful people-- Jodi Huzienga, a friend's mother, and Edith Humenick, my great aunt. Both lost their battle to illnesses. Jodi was in her sixties and Aunt Edith in her eighties.

On Tuesday morning, I sat in a pew next to my dear friend Pam at Jodi's funeral. Pam and I both lost our father's in the same year and the events of the morning filled our eyes with tears. The alter was filled with flowers and the seats with admiring friends and family. I remembered days around the pool with Jodi where she played with her grandchildren. The two things I always admired about her was how obvious it was that she loved those children dearly and how incredible she looked in a bathing suit. I can't even look like her in bathing suit at 37, let alone when I'm 60. I listened intently to every word of the service because even in death, Jodi was exhibiting qualities that I admired. Her sons spoke so fondly of her as a mother and told stories of the adventures they shared together. What could make a mother's life more valuable than to hear her grown sons publicly express their gratitude and appreciation for her love? What a lucky woman Jodi was. Every description of Jodi noted her deep conviction in Christ. How she taught her sons the importance of religious belief and how strong hers remained even while she was sick. It was clear by the end of the funeral that Jodi was sitting with her good friend Jesus.

Tuesday night was the wedding of Dr. Betti Hertzberg and Dr. Allen Ressler. You might recognize Dr. Betti's name because she is BlueSuitMom's resident pediatrician. Each week she answers your questions about your children's health issues. I met Dr. Betti almost two years ago. She is a remarkable human being and perhaps the greatest doctor I have ever known. Her dedication to children is hard to describe.

Recently, I told her about a friend's baby that was ill and without hesitation, she drove two hours each way to visit her in the hospital. I'm sure you will agree that there are few doctors today that would do that for a patient, let alone a non-patient. The best part about this wedding was that Dr. Betti was marrying an equally wonderful man. After debating for half a day as to whether it was proper or not to wear black to a Jewish wedding, I arrived dressed in my powder blue suit. By the way, up until minutes before the ceremony started, I was the only female not in black. It was a small elegant affair and I was extremely honored to have been included along with my business partner, Rachael. Dr. Betti was nothing short of beautiful. She wore one of the most tasteful dresses I've ever seen on a bride. Unlike some second-time brides who try to wear white or off-white, Dr. Betti graced the room in an aqua-blue fitted dress complemented with a green shawl and veil. Did I say she was beautiful, yet? She was beautiful. The ceremony was a typical Jewish wedding, although I've only been to one other, so I think it was typical. The wedding party stood under the chupah, the rabbi spoke in Hebrew and they broke the glass. I've always been amazed by the traditions in the Jewish religion so I enjoyed receiving translations from the groom's cousin Eleanor who sat next to me. It was a joyous occasion, enriched with religious conviction and good people.

Finally, Thursday brought about my great-aunt's funeral in the Jehovah Witness Kingdom Hall. Before I confuse anyone who knows me as a fairly good Catholic girl, let me explain that my grandfather's side of the family are Jehovah Witnesses. My Roman Catholic great grandmother changed her religion shortly after passing through Ellis Island but my mother changed us back to Catholicism. Aunt Edith was one of five children, including my grandfather, who followed the words of Jehovah their entire lives. I remember as a child, seeing stacks of the Watch Tower on her coffee table. She prayed every day and even did missionary work for her church. She was committed in the greatest meaning of the word. Her funeral was very small with only a few members of her Hall and our immediate family. It was very different from Jodi's funeral and far less festive than Dr. Betti's wedding. The church Elder spoke of Aunt Edith's goodness and her conviction to Jehovah. It was clear that she was at peace in a place where she dreamed to be one day.

It was an exhausting week. One of those weeks, you just try to get through. It occurred to me sometime late Friday night that although they were very different, they were extremely similar. What I realized in recapping my week was that the religious conviction of each of these women shown through in their lives. Whether they called him God or Jehovah or spoke to him in Hebrew or English, in song or in verse, each of these women had a strong tie to a more powerful being. He lead them through life and their actions were a sign of their praise to him. Dr. Betti in the kind work she does every day for patients, Jodi in the joy she brought her family and Aunt Edith in her ambition to spread his word, each one walks the talk when it comes to their belief in goodness. I couldn't help but wonder how a person gets to be as good as these three women. Were they born with something that most people don't have or did they just keep trying until they got it right? It makes me want to try a little harder this week.

Regardless of your religion, thank God for people like Jodi, Dr. Betti and Aunt Edith.

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Also see:
• Week Forty-Three -- Summer vacations
• Week Forty-Two -- Seeing the world through a child's eye
• Week Forty-One -- Re-living single days teaches the importance of family
• Week Forty -- Sometimes we need a break
• Week Thirty-Nine -- Summer camps
• Week Thirty-Eight -- The teachers that shape our lives
• Week Thirty-Seven -- Reuniting with old friends
• Week Thirty-Six -- Tips for managing a large family
• Week Thirty-Five --Fulfilling my dreams
• Week Thirty-Four --Parenting approaches
• Week Thirty-Three -- Combining a business trip with spring break
• Week Thirty-Two -- Making Spring Break plans
• Week Thirty-One -- Importance of a Support System
• Week Thirty -- Life is good
• Week Twenty-nine -- My nine year anniversary
• Week Twenty-Eight --Does birth order matter?
• Week Twenty-Seven -- Things we take for granted
• Week Twenty-Six -- My youngest turned two
• Week Twenty-Five -- Losing someone you love
• Week Twenty-Four -- Where's the romance in Valentine's Day?
• Week Twenty-Three -- The call I've been waiting for
• Week Twenty-Two -- Where did the weekend go?
• Week Twenty-One -- Business trip challenges
• Week Twenty -- Girl Scout cookie time
• Week Nineteen -- Thoughts on motherhood
• More diary entries

Maria Bailey is the CEO and founder of BlueSuitMom.com and a mother of four children under the age of seven.